Maggie Lee (Book 22): The Hitwoman Goes To Prison Read online

  “I’ll walk you out,” I said.

  He nodded. He shook Ian’s hand, gave Marlene a big hug, and walked out the door with me. “Are you protecting me from the peacock?”

  “You have no idea the damage that bird can do with his claws,” I told him. “Everything okay?”

  He nodded. “I’m just tired.” Something in his tone sounded so vulnerable that I reached out and touched his arm.

  “Is there anything I can help with?” I asked.

  He threw back his head and laughed. “Maggie, with everything on your plate, why are you asking if you can help me?”

  “Because you’re practically family,” I told him. “Doesn’t matter how busy I get; I’ll always be here for you.”

  He threw his arms around my shoulders and gave me a squeeze. “I appreciate that.”

  “And I appreciate that you spoke to Darlene about me,” I said quietly.

  I felt him freeze, and he actually stumbled as we walked along. Recovering, he asked, “She told you about that?”

  I tried to search his face, but it was night, and the shadows obscured a lot of his expression.

  “She mentioned it,” I said, playing things close to the vest. His reaction told me that more had happened than Darlene had revealed in her note. I was curious as to what that was.

  He shrugged. “I was only trying to do what was right.”

  I nodded, wondering if he knew that he was echoing his boss’s words from earlier.

  “Why is that always so damn hard?” I asked.

  Zeke shrugged. “Maybe because anything that’s worth doing is hard,” he suggested.

  I nodded. He got into his car, started it, waved and drove away. I stood there for a long moment in the dark, enjoying being alone for a change. All of the animals were still in the house, and I was truly alone.

  I took a deep breath, trying to loosen the tight band of tension that seemed to have settled permanently around my chest as different anxieties ebbed and flowed.

  “Stay out of the Pelly business,” a male voice said gruffly.

  Startled, I let out a yelp and stumbled backwards.

  A man, tall, wearing an Elvis mask, stepped closer to me.

  “If you know what’s good for you, and what’s good for your family, you’ll stay out of the Pelly business,” he repeated.

  I slowly began to walk backward, wondering if I could outrace him to the house.

  “Tell me you understand,” he said in a menacing way.

  “I understand,” I said. It didn’t mean I was going to do what he said, but I could understand it.

  He took another step toward me. “I’m not sure if I believe you,” he said. “I think maybe you need some convincing.” Before I could move, he’d snapped a hand around my wrist and yanked me hard in his direction.

  Eyes. Nose. Throat. Groin.

  Instinctively, I kicked out at his groin, but he anticipated my move and twisted me around so that I was practically dangling from his grip, intense pain radiating all the way down my arm to my neck.

  “Okay, okay,” I conceded. “I got your message.”

  “But you tried to fight back,” the man said. “That was a mistake.” He twisted my arm a little bit more and I groaned, fighting back a scream so as not to endanger anybody in the house.

  “Foe!” Percy screeched from the darkness.

  “Yes,” I gasped, “he is a foe.”

  I heard the beating of wings, but it was too dark to see where he was coming from. The man loosened his grip on my arm as he tried to identify the sound. I twisted quickly, driving my palm upward into his nose. He released me, howling with pain.

  With Percy screeching and flapping, I took off toward the house, but he caught me a second later. Before I could yell for help, it arrived in the most unexpected source.

  31

  An angry squeal pierced the night as Matilda charged my attacker.

  Startled, he loosened his grip on my wrist just as she collided with his shins at full speed.

  The little porky juggernaut knocked him right off his feet.

  I hesitated, staggering and trying to catch my balance. I didn’t know if I should run back to the house or go in for the kill. The idea of taking somebody out on my grandfather’s property didn’t seem wise, but I couldn’t have somebody coming after me.

  Before I could make a decision about what to do, I saw the headlights of a car barreling toward me. I scrambled to get out of its way, warning, “Matilda, look out!”

  She saw the lights and scrambled away.

  “Percy,” I yelled. “Come to me, come to me!”

  The peacock followed the sound of my desperate cries and moved out of the path of the approaching vehicle. The man on the ground staggered to his feet, angry.

  I didn’t bother to warn him. The driver of the car didn’t bother to hit the brakes.

  My attacker had just reached a fully standing position when the car plowed into him.

  His body went flying with a sickening thud, and he fell to the ground like a broken rag doll.

  I stared at the car, wondering if it was coming for me next. I felt like I was in a Stephen King novel.

  The door opened, and the driver emerged. I let out a sigh of relief when I saw it was Patrick Mulligan.

  The redhead asked, “You okay?”

  I nodded, not trusting myself to speak. I was pretty shaken from the encounter.

  “I’ve got to clean this up and get out of here,” he said.

  He popped the trunk of his car and headed toward the fallen man.

  “What is happening?” Percy demanded to know.

  “Shh,” I told him.

  Matilda wandered over to us, carefully avoiding Patrick.

  “Thank you,” I said to her.

  Patrick, thinking I was speaking to him, said, “No problem. I saw this guy staking out your place for the last couple of hours, I was curious as to what he was up to.”

  I shuddered, thinking he’d been watching Herschel’s home for so long.

  “Give me a hand?” Patrick asked.

  I hurried over and grabbed the man’s ankles. My shoulder twinged with pain, but I ignored it.

  Patrick pulled my attacker’s mask off. “Do you recognize him?”

  “No,” I grunted, straining to lift the dead man.

  Together, we carried the man over to Patrick’s car and dumped him unceremoniously into the trunk.

  “I’ve got to go,” Patrick said, glancing around to make sure nobody had seen us. “But you’re going to have to explain to me what the hell that all was about, and soon.”

  With that, the redhead got back in his car and pulled away just as quickly as he’d appeared.

  Flanked by the peacock and the pig, I watched him go.

  “The dead guy probably worked for the Concord family,” I said out loud. I hadn’t told Patrick that because I feared my work for Whitehat crossing paths with the rest of my life, but I didn’t doubt that while I didn’t recognize my attacker, I had a pretty good idea of who had sent him.

  “This is an exciting place,” Matilda said mildly.

  “I wish it wasn’t,” I told her. “You both saved me, thank you.”

  “Just returning the favor,” she said, curling her lips into a cheeky grin before sauntering off.

  “Would you like me to lead you back to your perch, Percy?” I asked.

  “Much appreciated,” he said. “But not necessary.” He flapped his wings and disappeared into the night.

  Rubbing my shoulder, I walked back toward the house.

  “Not so fast,” Piss yowled. I looked around for her, squinting into the darkness.

  “We’re going to have a meeting,” she announced.

  I groaned. “Another meeting?”

  “An animal family meeting,” she specified. “Meet us by Irma.”

  Shrugging, I shuffled off in the direction of the barn, wondering what the animals’ demands were going to be now.

  DeeDee was already
waiting in there, along with Ian, who held God in one hand and Benny in the other.

  “You’re part of this?” I asked my half-brother.

  He shrugged. “I’m just animal Uber.” He extended his hands, offering his charges to me. I took only Benny from him, unwilling to extend my other hand for God because of the pain I was in.

  “Just put him on the post,” I said to Ian, gesturing toward it with my chin.

  Ian nodded and did as I asked. “I don’t think I’m supposed to be here,” he said.

  “You’re not,” God intoned haughtily. “You’ve served your purpose; you can go now.”

  “Charming one,” Ian said, winking at me. “I’ll talk to you soon.” He walked away.

  Matilda, Percy, and Piss joined us.

  “Okay,” Piss declared. “We’re all here.”

  Glancing around, I noticed there was somebody missing. “Where’s Zippy?” I asked.

  “He’s the reason for the meeting,” Piss replied darkly.

  “Okay,” I said carefully. “What’s up?”

  “There’s something wrong with him,” Irma, the donkey, brayed.

  I looked at her, trying to figure out exactly what she meant. “I don’t understand.”

  “He’s changed,” Irma said. “Ever since you arrived.” There was no missing the accusation in her voice.

  Apparently, she was blaming me for Zippy’s change of character. I’d barely interacted with the little white dog.

  “He’s a monster,” Piss added.

  “There’s a lot of changes going on for everyone,” I began. “We all just need to be patient with one another.”

  “Well, you know I don’t like him,” Matilda said. She shook her head, flapping her ears for emphasis as to why she wasn’t fond of the little one with the sharp teeth.

  “You have to do something about him, Maggie,” God declared.

  “Like what?” I asked. “I can ask Herschel to talk to him, but besides that, what else are we supposed to do?”

  “I could kick him,” Irma offered.

  I scowled at her. “Violence is not the answer.”

  God chuckled. “That’s rich, coming from you.”

  “I’ll talk to him,” I said. “Maybe he has a good reason for acting the way he does. Maybe nobody’s ever given him a chance and tried to understand what he’s going through.”

  “Maybe he’s a terror who makes the rest of us miserable,” Percy opined, joining in the conversation.

  I felt a twinge of guilt, it wasn’t right that we were all standing around talking about someone who wasn’t around to defend himself.

  “I’ll talk to him,” I promised.

  “When?” Piss challenged.

  “As soon as possible,” I told her.

  “That means tonight,” she insisted. “We can’t have everyone living in fear.”

  I surveyed the animals around me. “Are you all afraid?”

  “I am, I am, I am,” Benny said from my palm.

  “He has been known to startle me,” Percy said. “Much more lately. He used to do it by mistake, but now he seems to delight in it.”

  “He tried to kill me,” Matilda said.

  “I really don’t think that he could kill you,” I told her. “You’re much bigger than him.”

  “I’m afraid of what he might do to the child,” Irma said.

  I whirled around and stared at the donkey. “What do you mean?”

  “If he wasn’t afraid to bite the pig,” she said. “What will he do if the child annoys him?”

  It wasn’t that I didn’t take the animals’ complaints seriously, but when I realized that Katie was in danger, I realized how dire the situation really was.

  “I’m going to talk to him now.”

  32

  I found Zippy in the living room, lolling on Herschel’s lap. They were sitting there, listening to a conversation between Aunt Leslie and Aunt Loretta about the collectability of shot glasses.

  “We have to talk,” I announced as soon as I walked into the room.

  Startled, my aunts looked at me worriedly.

  “What’s wrong, Maggie?” Loretta asked.

  I shook my head and pointed at Herschel and Zippy. “You. I need to talk to you.”

  The little dog bared his teeth at me. Herschel awkwardly got to his feet, clutching the little dog to his chest, and followed me outside.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked as soon as we’d cleared the doorway.

  “I’m worried about Zippy,” I said, my gaze swinging from the dog to my grandfather.

  “Worried, why?”

  “He’s been terrorizing the other animals, and I’m worried about what he could do to Katie,” I said bluntly.

  The dog began to growl at me. Not saying anything, just making a deep threatening noise in his throat.

  “Zippy,” Herschel said, giving him a light shake. “Behave yourself.”

  The dog nipped at his finger.

  Startled, he dropped him. The dog yelped when he hit the ground, and then scurried off.

  “Come back,” Herschel called after him. “Zippy, stop. Come!”

  The dog ignored him and disappeared into the night. “You’re bleeding,” I told him, noting the puncture marks on his finger.

  “He didn’t mean it,” Herschel said.

  “You need to talk to the other animals and hear their stories,” I said. “He’s turned into some sort of menace.”

  “Well, he’s not exactly Cujo,” Herschel pointed out.

  “But that doesn’t mean he’s not a danger,” I said. “Either you do something about him, or…” I trailed off, unsure of how to finish my threat.

  “I’ll remind you,” Herschel said, his voice shaking with anger, “this is my home, where you’re a guest. And he’s my pet, not your problem to take care of.” With that, he stalked back into the house, slamming the door behind him.

  “That went well,” God said from nearby. I turned around, looking for him. “Oh my gosh, I forgot you were still in the barn,” I apologized. “I am so sorry.”

  “Understandable,” he said dismissively. “You were concerned about Katie’s well-being. I’m over here, on the step.”

  I looked around, focused, and saw his shadowy figure on the corner of the step. I hurried over and scooped him up.

  “You tried. You tried. You tried,” Benny said from where he was still curled up in my palm.

  “I tried,” I admitted. “But I’m not sure that was good enough.”

  “We could post guards on her,” God suggested.

  “Guards?” I asked.

  “DeeDee could do it, and I’m sure Piss would, too,” the lizard suggested. “And maybe the pig.”

  I nodded at the wisdom of his words. It might take a little while to get everything sorted out, and knowing that at least one of the larger animals was with her at all times, to offer protection for Katie from the little white dog, made me feel a little better.

  “We’ll arrange it right away,” I said.

  “I’ll take first shift, Sugar,” Piss said. “I’m a lighter sleeper than the dog or the pig.”

  I glanced over to where she was standing a few yards away, having listened to the conversation.

  “Thank you,” I said.

  “But we can’t do this forever,” she said, trotting inside.

  I let out a heavy sigh. “Why is it that every time one problem seems solved, another arises?”

  “Because nature abhors a vacuum,” God opined.

  Shaking my head, I went inside to get Katie ready for bed.

  “What happened?” Leslie asked nervously as I walked through the living room.

  Thinking that she somehow knew about the man who attacked me, and that Patrick had killed with his car, I froze.

  “What did you say to Daddy that made him so angry?” Loretta asked.

  I let out a shaky sigh of relief. “I told him that I was worried that Zippy might hurt Katie,” I said.

  I put a hand
on my hip and waited expectantly for them to argue with me.

  They shared a look but said nothing.

  “That’s it?” I asked, not understanding their silence.

  “It’s a legitimate concern,” Loretta said. “He bit Griswald’s pants earlier.”

  I wondered why the little white dog had deemed it necessary to attack the U.S. Marshal.

  “We’ll work it out,” I assured my aunts.

  “I hope so,” Leslie said. “I haven’t seen Daddy that mad in a long time.”

  I bit my lip to prevent myself from pointing out that they hadn’t seen their father in many decades. Instead, I went and tucked Katie into bed.

  Piss was already curled up on the child’s pillow. “I’ll keep an eye on her,” she promised.

  I braced myself for God to say that she only had one eye, but he remained blessedly silent.

  “Sweet dreams, baby girl,” I told my niece, kissing her forehead.

  “Sweet dreams, Aunt Maggie.”

  Grudgingly, I left the room, pulling the door shut behind me.

  “The cat won’t let anything happen to her,” the lizard assured me.

  I nodded, knowing that he was right. “My arm’s killing me,” I confided on a whisper.

  “Why?” the lizard asked.

  “Somebody doesn’t want me looking into Rhonda Pelly’s case. I was threatened.”

  “Physically?” the lizard asked, clearly alarmed.

  “Percy and Matilda saved me,” I told him. “Oh yeah, and Patrick.”

  The lizard groaned. “The redhead is back?”

  “He made a very brief appearance,” I told him. “But he was very effective.”

  My cell phone buzzed. I glanced at the display and saw that it was from Zeke. The message said to meet him at the end of the driveway.

  I wondered why he was back; it couldn’t be for anything good.

  I left Benny in my bedroom, gathered DeeDee, who had taken up residence in the kitchen watching Templeton chop vegetables, and headed back out into the darkness.

  “What do you think happened?” God asked.

  “I don’t know,” I told him. “But whatever it is, it can’t be good.”

  33

  Zeke was already out of his car, pacing nervously in front of the headlights, by the time I reached the end of the driveway.